looking back

A year is almost gone..
So many things happened..

Kids did exceptionally well in school. They got 5 high distinction, 6 distinction between themseles for the ICAS tests.
School report, except for Yaya, who got B for Maths, they got A’s for all the subjects.
Yaya won the outstanding student award, by learning to read, write and speak Japanese in less than a year. ( that is one language I could never master!!). Right now our relationship is fine. I know it can blow up any time. I guess this will last a few more years.
It was a relief that toothless finally come around and understood that if he was going to push the boundaries, he was going to pay the consequences himself. He didn’t get in to trouble the last quarter!
He is also a good cook, can whip up a KD for himself without any trouble. He also makes very good pizza. He has zero linguistic skills and has been trying to learn Japanese along with his sister and still doesn’t know a word of Japanese.
He now cycles to school. ( it was really hard for me to allow him to cycle to school. Daniel Morecombe’s case is always on my mind.. But I know there is only so much I can do and the children need to learn to make responsible decisions, so I let him.. )
Baby is now a good violin player.. she seems to be enjoying her violin lessons. I usually stay to watch her, cause when she is very much immersed in to the music, she nods her head with the rhythm..and it is so cute to see it.
I guess I survived another mothering year..
And I wait to see what the next year will bring..
Wishing you all a merry christmas and a very happy new year.

The box

My youngest daughter is fascinated with boxes. Any box for that matter, be it cereal box or even the shipping box. She just loves the boxes!!
Few times she even wore a box on top of her t shirt ( thinsation carton from cosco was her favourite) and pretended to be a cookie box. I was visitng a friend and my daughter insisted on coming with me as a cookie box..and I let her, mostly because I was sure she would take the box off when we reached the destination..She didn’t.. She was happy being a cookie box.
But now it has become worst..
The last few months she watched TV sitting inside a shipping carton..Kids only get 30 minutes of TV time and I was sure, 30 minutes of sitting cramped in a tiny carton was not going to harm her..and I was also sure she would get tired of it and will stop doing it sooner or later..
Not so..
Now she sits inside a shipping box and read for hours on end. She has a pillow and a blanket inside the box! and her favourite perch is my bed.
I really don’t know what to do.
Is this normal?

The vanishing child

Perhaps this is the chrysalis stage.. perhaps I might find the most beautiful butterfly at the end of this journey.. I hope so..

A year ago, the usual conversation after I pick the kids up from school and on our way back would be..
How was school?
Each would give an an honest answer, and update me what they did, their teacher said , their friends did etc.
All I needed to ask was one question.

Now, the younger two still gives a full update.
With Yaya, this is how it goes
How was school?
How was your Teacher
What did you learn today?
What kind of stuff?
I know when to shut up, so I do.
Usually, after the kids come back from school, they have their snack, play for a little while and then lay down with me ( according to my mother’s theory, I should be blind now, cause I always lay down and read( not good for your eyesight) and let my children do the same) and we read till supper time.
Now as soon as Yaya comes back from school, she grabs the snack and go to her room and stay there till supper.

Of course there are days, i get a glimpse of the child that she was..like when we go for grocery shopping and how she still push the trolley and drag her feet..Or when she makes lemonade in all different hues on planet earth..or when she makes breakfast in bed for me..
before, those were the regular stuff that she did.
Now those are the things that I cherish the most, cause they happen so very rarely..
I know she needs her space and she is trying to find out who she is..
But I miss my baby..
I wish she wouldn’t build walls around her..

I am terrified of two things. Fear of failure and fear of screwing up as a mother to my children.

My mother was not a good role model and I always had a general idea of what I wouldn’t do to my children. But then there was the other end of the spectrum..the wondering part..where I am constantly worried if I am doing the right thing..
Yesterday was Yaya’s year 7 graduation.
When most of the kids in her class wore branded clothes, she picked a 29$ dress from BigW. I offered to buy her something expensive, but she chose not to, saying it is just for one day and she doesn’t see the need to spend so much money unnecessarily.
I am never good with makeup or hair styling. So I got her an appointment at the salon. She got her hair curled.
She looked gorgeous!!!
At the party, the emcee called my daughter’s name to come to the stage to give the speech. I had aabsolutely no idea that she was giving a speech. She didn’t tell me!
( now here is the wondering part.. Was i a failure because I didn’t ask her if she was giving a speech? was I a failure, cause if she had told me, perhaps I could have helped her write the speech and made it better? Should I have done that?? write her speech?? It is her life.. she should write her speech.. No??)
When we came back, she left the graduation book on the table and I had a look at it.
she had answered 20 years from now..” I hope to live in Venice and earn my living as an interior decorator”
I thought hmmm.. that is good plan..
As I continued to read, there was one question that caught my eye.
Your role model..and my daughter answered..”my mom”
May be I am not screwing it all up..

Why you must never use DHL

I had to send some documents to Canada urgently and used DHL..It costs 95AUD, and the person manning the counter at the DHL told me, it would arrive at the destination in three days..
I send the packagel on 16th..It should have arrived on the 19th..
It didn’t
Each time I called the DHL australia, I got to speak to a different person.. Each promising the same..”they will initiate an investigation and let me know by tomorrow”
Now what you need to know is, DHL is a firm believer of “ganapathy’s wedding” Their tomorrows never arrive..Which leads me to make more phone calls.. which leads to more tomorrows..
Finally I was given the reason, the Canadian custom held the package . What is odd is that, this was not a parcel. It was documents..
Then the DHL had the audacity to tell me that the third party was involved in customs clearance and the delay was because of the third party and apparently I, the customer was responsible for the third party\s delay ( ie, According to them, I chose the third party!!! How that is possible, when I am sitting here in Australia and the package was send from here through DHL and I do not have any control as to who clears what from where?)
The package was delivered yesterday. 14 days after I send it.
I asked DHL to return my money, for if I had send the same thing by ordinary post, it would have reached the destination in 7 days,, DHL refuses to return the 85$ I paid by hiding behind the clause” they are not responsible for the delay”
DHL sucks big time..