My grandmother once told me..the biggest enemy for a woman is another woman.
Isn’t that an irony?
Aren’t women supposed to be loving, caring, understanding..all encompassing goddess of good will on earth?
I thought life is pretty simple… that what goes around comes around…
Why then do we see manipulative conniving ones among our midst?
because they think they are smart?
because they think it is important to win?
Win at all cost?
Today I had a FB request from a friend I have known in my school days.
I think friend is a misnomer here..it should be an aquaintance.
She was studying in the englsh medium with an attitude to match..and I was in the malayalam medium with hardly any attitude to compare..
Then she joined the malayalam medium in the 9th std. She was in my class..I was a loner and all the students in my class had their own groups and like me she was excluded. I felt sorry for her and tried to be her friend. She was everything that I wasn’t.. she was very good in sports, when every time I threw the javellin the earth’s gravity suddenly increases.. ( there is actually a comic strip by calvin and hobbes about gravity. Here)Ok, I was digressing.. Anyway..I was glad to finally have a friend..I remembered to give her b’day card on her b’day.( still do), helped her with home work.. when she was sick and missed school when we were in 10th, I went to her house after school and gave her my notes, so she could copy them.
Today I am officially divorced..
I am now among those who couldn’t make it work. I had promised to love and cherish till death did us apart and I didn’t keep my word.
I have no one to talk to,..
So here I am, officially a single mother of three..
So many dreams
so much of hope
wasn’t it Solomon who said sakalathum maya..
I am still where I have been all along..
craving for love
for someone to love me
care for me
be with me..
accept me for what I am..
the pain.. it never goes away..
It is not very often I watch movies. Actually, I am not sure when this change actually happened. Before ( 10 years ago) when they announce the Oscar list, I would go through it and most likely would have seen at least 60 % of the movies( English language!). And would make sure that I watched the ones I missed out watching.
I have not watched a single movie in this year’s Oscar list. Not One. How sad is that!
I also have not watched anything on telly since moving to Australia. ( Initially it was because most of the programs like the CSI Miami shown here were repeats that I have already watched when I was in Canada) Atleast I usually would plonk in front of the TV to watch Home alone, National Lampoon’s christmas holidays and sound of Music with my children the week before christmas. It is our family tradition. (My Children used to watch National Lampoon CH at their grandmother’s house when she lived close to us. It was mandatory that they visit her, drink hot chocolate, watch the movie and then we all would go for a drive in her car to watch the Christmas lights.
I tried getting myself exhausted to such levels that if I moved an inch, I would collapse..
I tried drinking to oblivion
I tried a glass of warm milk
I tried all the known remedies that would let me sleep for a while
Nothing ever worked.
Every night, I wake up at 2 Am
Yesterday, for the first time in years.. I actually slept through..I woke up at 5 AM..