A friend of Yaya passed away recently. (medical reasons) and it has made a huge impact on all three of my kids.

We have regular  conversations about death, afterlife, funeral etc..

Yesterday evening Yaya came to me and asked how to write her will.. and I asked her why she thinks she needs a will.

“Mom, until now, I didn’t really have much to give to my siblings, but right now I have close to 20K in the bank. I want you to divide the money equally between my siblings and it can only be used to pay for their uni.. I want you to give all the things I booked for my gap year to my friend L. (L is from a very poor family and dreams about travelling, but can’t afford a trip around the world and I know that is the reason Yaya chose L. Besides my son and Baby can’t go on a solo trip right now) I want you to give all my baby books, toys etc to your first grandchild., the rest of the books has to be divided equally between my siblings”

I said fine.

When I went to bed, I thought of my siblings.. Why is that my child could think of her siblings and care for them unselfishly, yet  my sisters and I will never see eye to eye?

In a way I am glad, I walked away from my family, or all my children would ever have seen would be how my sisters and I bicker and fight.. for every little thing..

5 thoughts on “Will

  1. I think your past and your relationship with your family helped you explore better alternatives and NOT what to do when raising children. The tactics you chose and I guess the fact that you branched out alot and have more diverse exposure compared to most Indian families gave way in raising well adjusted, confident and nurturing children. In addition, you obviously don’t display ego and aren’t a strict authoritarian, rather you let your kids talk with you, disagree with you and most importantly, let them be their own person. And because of that, they are respectful, well mannered and are very considerate. You’ve done well as mom. Don’t let anyone think you haven’t (especially those who tsk tsk you because your kids aren’t “Indian” enough). I wish some of my family would take example from you some of them are just your family and all they do is destroy relationships among each other. But as I said before, they taught me personally on how NOT to raise kids, assuming I have children in the future. Definitely following your model if I ever become a parent.

    Props to you!! And has Yaya decided where she wants to go to college yet?

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