Yesterday evening, we decided to go out for dinner to celebrate the end of our holidays, perhaps the end of our good times together.. Since we have been together, the one thing I hadn’t cooked for him is dosai.. even when we went to Malaysia, somehow he never got a chance to eat dosai. So I wanted to go to an Indian restaurant for dinner, so he could have dosai… I googled to find a place nearby and unfortunately for us, either the address was wrong or the shop closed down. However we did end up in a street with lots of restaurants. There were French, Mexican and even a Spanish restaurant, but he knew I wanted to go to an Indian restaurant and insisted we walk down the street till we find one. Eventually we did. Mukka on Fitzroy street. They had an assortment south and north Indian food and he let me place the order. I knew he likes Aubergines, so I ordered the Bhartha and roti, one masala dosai and a pav bhaji set to share between us. He loved it all (to be fair, he looked like a cooked prawn at the end of the meal and I did feel a bit bad for not ordering something less spicy)
There was so much we needed to tell each other, but goodbyes are hard to say and we both chose to read instead of talking when we got back to our hotel. It was a horrible night. .I could feel him toss and turn and the bed creaked every time he moved. He set the alarm for 7 AM to my fav song..and I let it ring..hoping to delay the impending doom. He knew I was awake.. and I knew he was awake.. only the alarm didn’t know that we were both awake and continued the ringing.
Eventually he got up and I knew he was going to make me tea. He knows I need two sugars, but will only add a single sugar in my tea( for my health apparently) We had some cookies, so he served tea in bed with cookies. This was going to be the last time he made me tea and I wanted to cherish the moment.. but somehow it made me feel even more miserable.
He used the washroom first and when I went to brush my teeth, I noticed that he left his lip balm on the counter..so I could use it. The cold Melbourne weather had caused my lips to bleed.. I took a shower, so I could cry my heart out.
Eventually we got to the airport, returned the rental car and found our flight was delayed.
I had planned my exit well. I deactivated my facebook account first thing in the morning and already got a new phone number. I was planning to go to my house straight from the airport and have no contact with him till he leaves on Thursday. I hate goodbyes.
“Let us play scrabble” he said, and we did.
When we boarded the flight, the cabin crew noticed that we were sitting in two different rows. I am not sure how the cabin crew knew we were travelling together(our tickets were booked separately), but they did and promised us that once the light take off, they will find two seats for us. The seat next to me was empty and the moment the cabin door was closed, he came and sat next to me.
“You can now sleep peacefully” He said pointing to his shoulder. I have always slept on his shoulder every time we flew. He wouldn’t move at all, so I can sleep peacefully and not get migraine.
When we landed, he said ” Why don’t you come to my place and spend a few hours with me before you go home” He sounded so needy (not in a bad way) and I didn’t have the heart to say No. So we took a taxi from the airport and went to his house. (I wonder if he knew I was going to do a runner..he even insisted that I leave my backpack at his place and come and pick up later)
For some strange reason, I remembered I have a friend who owns an RTO( registered training organization) that you can apply to study some course and get a student visa.
“Why don’t you call him?” He asked and I did. My friend sent the application etc and within 30 minutes he filled the whole thing and sent it back.
He may or may not get the student visa.
He may or may not come back from Spain..
We may never be together again..
But right now..this very moment..I feel hopeful..