Today my youngest has her violin exam.
All through the weekend, she was in a crabby mood. She practiced her exam song few times everyday. Last night she came to me and said
“Mom, what if I failed my violin exam?”
I told her ” if you think you are going to fail, chances are that you might, but if you think you are going to give your best shot and do it well, you might pass”
“But I am scared Mom” She replied
I told her, ” muthey, exams were invented to actually find out how effective the teacher was in teaching and not meant to make you scared. I think it should be the teacher who really ought to be stressed, not you.”
She looked at me incredulously, for only her mother can come up with such great words of wisdom.
I took some chocolates with me when I dropped her to school and gave her that and told her
” muthey, there is no point in getting stressed, it just make you feel awful, today is a beautiful day and you are going to give your best shot. The worst that can happen is that you failed, but it is not the end of the world. For me, what matters is that you gave your best shot. So enjoy your day and good luck”
She still looked stressed.. perhaps in time she will learn, success in exams alone do not define who you are or where you end up..
Btw, I would have liked to tell her that ” if you practiced properly everyday instead of the half hearted practice you did, perhaps you wouldn’t be in this position”, but I know from my life’s experience that the last thing my child needs is for her mother to put her down when she is already suffering from her own guilt trip..So, I didn’t.