Last week ( two weeks after school reopened), my youngest lost her pencil case which held all the new pencils, pens etc I bought for the new school year as well as her mobile phone and gocard. She had bought a fashionable, albeit small school bag and it wasn’t big enough to carry her new laptop, her Bible ( aka Spanish dictionary ) etc. I told her to carry the laptop in her hand, the advice she ignored and as she walked back from school, her pencil case fell out. She borrowed money from her friend for the bus fare and when I came back home, she mentioned very casually ” mom, I lost my pencil case, you will need to get me a new gocard and a phone”
I was really annoyed and angry with her, because if she had listened to me and carried her laptop in her hand, her pencil case wouldn’t have fallen out. But more than anything what bothered me was the fact that, she wasn’t afraid to tell me that she lost her phone, her gocard etc. When I was growing up, if I had lost something, then I would have been so worked up to tell my mother.. I can still feel the fear and trepidations of facing my mother’s wrath.
I scolded my youngest, she apologized and told me, “I didn’t set out deliberately to lose my stuff Mom, but I am sorry. I also went to the school office and reported to the lost and found” and off she went to watch the cartoon on telly.
I was so annoyed because all those things cost a lot of money and the fact that she didn’t get worked up like I used to.. As I made my tea, I wondered if I am really being a hopeless mom because I felt I was much more careful with my things for I really didn’t want to face my mother’s wrath.
The very next day, my son came to me to tell me that ” I am sorry mom, but I lost my lunch box and I don’t know where and how I lost it” ( Brand new thermos lunch box)
How can you not know where you kept your lunch box?
I scolded him for being irresponsible.
I want my children to learn to be responsible, but I don’t know if I should use fear tactics to make them learn responsibilities…