Though I studied in Malayalam medium, my vocabulary has diminished a great deal over the year because I don’t talk to anyone in Malayalam. However, there are some words that I can never forget.  Today’s word is safalyam. I don’t know the right word for it in English, but at the end of this post, I hope you will get it.

I grew up wanting a family where everyone loves and supports each other. Yet, here I am, 43 years old with a last will and testament that says if anything happens to me, my sisters shouldn’t be told about it and even if they came to know, they will not be allowed to attend my funeral. I walked away from my family and don’t want anything to do with any of my family members.

Yaya came back from Mexico day before yesterday with a severe jet lag and went to school yesterday morning without taking her gocard ( bus pass). They were already running late and she didn’t have enough time to come back home to get the gocard. Her brother gave her his gocard and told her, he will handle the bus driver’s wrath.

Although there is a policy that says “no child left behind”, that allows children without money/bus pass to travel on public transport without paying, the drivers are not very amenable to follow the law. It is not because the drivers are mean, it is because a lot of kids are deliberately exploiting the loophole to travel free. My son got in to the bus and apologized to the driver for forgetting his gocard and was promptly yelled at. He listened to the yelling and when the bus driver finished his rant, my son was given a warning not to do it again and was allowed to travel.

He gave his gocard to his sister because he knows she can’t handle the bus driver yelling at her. To be loved like that by your sibling is the biggest blessing life can give you..I wasn’t lucky, but my children are..that is my life’s safalyam

14 thoughts on “Safalyam

  1. Absolutely! That is the saphalyam of any mother’s life… and you do deserve it Sarah! Itha sahodaranmar othorumichu vasikunnathu ethra subhavum ethra manoharavum akunnu!!
    Now you can add a few more to your malayalam vocabulary !! hi hi……… 🙂

  2. We have the whole word crying hoarse about how children neglect looking after aged parents. There is no forum which empathizes with children not treated fair by parents. no movies, no documentaries nothing. The world is unaware or is it turning a blind eye ? My mom was always partial to my older sis whom she taught was a ideal kid. Always studying and not upto anything naughty and saying only politically right things and of course praising mom. She loved my younger bro as he was a boy born after two girls. That leaves me out….. I was not good looking as her older daughter, always took chances at school, got into trouble with everyone, had temper issues.etc. Dad supported me , but when they got old, he started following mom.
    This hurts a lot coz you do not have anybody to call your own. I hate all those who differntiate between their children. Their behaviour towards me has made me a better person, accept people better, not be a hypocrite and most important be a good mom to my kids

    • Dee: My mother still makes us fight.. My mother had this manthra that no one in my father’s family gets along with each other and we four only has each other and must do everything to get along and then do everything to make us fight with each other…When I met her last time I went to India, I told my mother that ” I love her”. She immediately called my oldest sister to tell her that I told her I love sister then wanted justification/explanation as to “how dare you tell Amma you love her?”
      I have no blood family that I can lean on.. but I do have friends.. tons of them..who will step in without asking anything.. I also am a better mother because I know there is no way I want to be anything like my mother ever was.

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