I went for an interview in a wellness center. 2 interviews actually. Second was by the medical doctor, who runs the place. Everything was fine. Till she asked me if I have children. And I said yes. 3 kids. I could see her attitude change suddenly.She looked at me straight and told me.” I have a daughter and it is so hard to balance work and home, since you have three kids, it means three times the trouble” She assumed that, I will take 3 times the normal sick leave to take care of the kids and would never be able to work properly.
I was so close to getting a job and having some sanity. On the way back home after the interview, I was mad at the kids. I was mad that I gave up my career to raise them. I was even mad that I had kids. If i didn’t have kids, I would have been a specialist by now. My classmates are all working in prestigious hospitals as senior consultants, while I am putting all my hopes on a wellness center for a job. My best friend works in John Hopkins as an MD. When we were struggling through the medical school days, we would see papers and papers published by the Dr’s at John Hopkins and we would tell ourselves, One day we would make it to John Hopkins, finding cure and healing. She did, and I didn’t.
I never went back to my old students reunion dinners, cause it hurts to see that I was nothing but a loser. I was one of the top student at my medical school. One of my professors when he met my mom, told her that he still look for my pictures or news about me in the newspapers, because he knew I would be one of the best doctors. My mom normally calls me the world class idiot.

When I reached home,I was still mad, I wanted to kick the door, kick the plants that are outside and I also wanted to throw the kids out. I was also mad at my mom too. If she helped a little bit, I could have still worked. All I wanted was someone home to have an eye on the maid. But my mom too didn’t want to help. She wanted to gallavant around the world.I haven’t had this much anger in me before.
I opened the door and i saw the sweetest smile on my kids.My oldest asked me, mama did you get the job? No, I wanted to scream and tell her, it is beacuse of you I didn’t get a job. Somehow I controlled and I asked her Why are you asking me that, and she replied, “Mama, I don’t want a nanny to take care of us,I want you to take care of us, You are the best mama in the whole world” Then It dawned to me, If I ever had a second chance to do things in life, I would still choose to have my kids. That sometimes we do things, because we want to do it. It may not be the right thing, It must have been the worst decision in my life. My kids didn’t chose me. I chose to have them. And i will never ever regret having them. Never ever.
Here is to the Dr, who told me, my three kids means three times the trouble. No ma’am. You are wrong. My three kids means three times the happiness. I may not have made it to John Hopkins, But I am one heck of a mama and I made a difference to three kids. I passed my motherhood test with flying colours.. That is all that matters. Really.