Yesterday night Yaya came to my room and said she can’t sleep.
All three of my kids go through these periods of finding it difficult to sleep. ( Apparently some gifted children have trouble sleeping.)
I have tried everything I know to help my kids to go to bed on time.
I am worried that they would be tired at the school if they don’t get enough sleep, besides I can’t go to bed till my kids are asleep.

I tried warm bath, warm milk, regular night time routines etc etc.. Nothing worked

Then my doctor suggested sending them for sports, that would make them physically exhausted. I followed his suggestion and registered them for swimming and skating. That is now turning out to be a mistake as well.
My kids are extremely intense. They keep pushing themselves because they are too impatient to go through the normal way of doing things.
Everything must be done in excess. There is no normal way to do things, be it swimming or a science fair project.
Last September I registered the kids to do Kumon Maths because I was concerned that they might find it difficult when we move to Australia and they have to skip a grade. I also thought it might be a good challenge for them.
In 4 months Yaya reached level G ( high school maths), her brother reached level E and baby reached level C.
In another year Yaya will finish all levels of Kumon (according to her instructor).
I am sure most you would be thinking this blog article is an extension of ego post or a post to boast about my children.
I am not.
I am so exhausted and I really don’t know how to raise gifted children. No one knows what I go through.
Each time I register the kids for an activity, I am so scared.
Because I am the one who watches them pushing themselves. I am the one who sees the anger and tantrums when things don’t go the way my children expect them to. I am the one who sees their frustrations and often I am the one who end up being battered emotionally.

Then there is this fear of after this what is next? Once they complete kumon where will I send them to keep them busy?
If i don’t keep them busy, then that is another headache.

There is also the fear of my children getting bored at school because they already know so much.

Last night I taught Yaya how to spell backwards. ( I do that when I can’t sleep and thought it might work for her). At 11.30 in the night I was too exhausted to keep awake and entertain a 10 year old.
Still I had to suggest words for my daughter to spell and also had to make sure she spelled it backwards correctly, I was so angry with her because she couldn’t simply think of a word to spell, but expected me to do it for her and expected me to check her answers.
She eventually spelled Harry Potter Order of Phoenix in one go without stopping which terrified me. (I can’t do it. I do one word at a time). She eventually slept after spelling all the months of the year, days of the week, names of Current Prime ministers from EU.

So here I am, still crabby, annoyed and angry, but mostly I am clueless. I feel I am doing everything wrong and am wrecking my children’s life.

I know it is a wishful thinking, but I just want a normal life ( Right now I don’t even know what is Normal)

5 thoughts on “

  1. Hey..
    I can imagine how difficult it would be..
    I used to work in an Institution which had both gifted children and children with learning disorders (sometimes kids who had both).
    It was amazing how the gifted children helped the other kids.They invented stuff..innivative methods to teach their counterparts and had much more patience with them than any of us..
    Now my point is, you dont have to try too much dear.
    Gifted children always find something or the other to keep themselves occupied with.
    Probably, you will have to start weening off from the supply side and Im sure they would find their interest areas..

    And regardless of all that, all the best with it!!!

    Sometimes life gives you in excess as if its guilty of taking away some other things…So enjoy this like bungee jumping or something…:)

  2. Jina: Some days I am the fly and some days I am the windshield.. but most days I am simply exhausted.
    I tried leaving the kids alone hoping they would find things to do on their own..
    Unfortunately their intensity to do whatever in excess means that they squabble with each other so much, then they fight with me, then I have to hear I am bored every second ( multiply that with three).
    When the weather is nice and I want them to go out and play, they will do it, only if I go out with them.
    Power struggles are routine.

    Some days I feel there is no end to what I go through and the fact that it is the beginning of the month and I am probably having PMS is not helping either!

  3. Hi Sarah,

    I sometimes have trouble sleeping too and at times I would go thru some of the drill u’ve told me about.. What I realise now is – activities like spelling backwards would keep me awake longer – coz it is a new challenge , it sharpens ur senses, rather than dulling them… I try music,walking around, eating something,reading something incredibly boring. Sometimes they work, sometimes none do and it gets frustrating.

  4. you know what..ridiculous as it sounds..maybe u shud talk to them about it..
    I am sure they would be able to perceive it better that ways..
    Just one random question,do they play musical instruments??

  5. Aditi: Usually when my children come to my room saying they can’t sleep, They just want to be entertained..
    Music and books have already been tried by that time.
    I know what you are saying.. teaching them to do things makes their brain more active..But they don’t want cuddles and quiet time.. they want me to talk, tell them a story, answer a question, let us play this game or that game etc etc, and when I am sleepy and tired I don’t do welll in telling a story or playing a game.
    I honestly don’t know what else to do..

    Jina: I tried talking to them so many times, still trying..But they are extremely focused on what they want and will go all out to get what they want..For me the biggest challenge is setting a boundary and for them the biggest challenge is how to push the boundary.

    Yaya plays Piano and guitar.
    Toothless plays Guitar.
    Baby is not interested in any musical instruments.. she only wants to learn about oceans and whales.

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