The lunch time visiting hours was about to end when I reached the hospital. There was a long line of autos waiting outside the hospital entrance and I braced myself for the verbal assaults accoladed to me for being a woman.
Whistling, catcalls and suggestive words were thrown at my direction and I looked down and walked fast.
India, the land that has female goddesses, the land that once had a female rulers Rani Lakshmi Bhai, Razia Sultana, even a female prime minister.. and the male inhabitants of the same land won’t let a woman walk alone in the day time without being accosted.
I wanted to look in the eyes of each person who was ogling at me and ask them, don’t you have a mother/ sister at home? Do you look at them the same way?
Pointless. It was pointless.
I remembered Amma telling me to ignore these creeps. Her words, “If you react, you are only making them more powerful”
I wanted to react. I wanted to scream and tell them to leave me alone.
But I didn’t. I walked quickly to the main entrance.
The security guard was standing outside the grill door and letting the visitors out, while making sure no one managed to squeeze and go inside.
He looked at me.
“Yes” He bellowed.
I wasn’t really sure what he wanted from me. It isn’t that this is the first time he has seen me. Besides, I had my lab coat in my hand.
“I want to go to the wards” I replied
“Why?”
My blood pressure was going up by the second.
Well, first of all he has no right to ask me that question. I am medical student and I can go to the wards any time I want to. Second of all, no there is no need for a second reason.
“Who are you to ask me that?” I asked him.
Now he was angry.
“Visitor hours are over” He retaliated
“I am not a visitor. I showed him my ID and demanded
“Open the door”
He looked at me for a few seconds and I was just about to scream at him and ask him to open the damn door when he turned to open the door.
He opened it a little bit, kind of telling me that if you wanted to go in, then you open it. I ain’t your servant.
Fine, so be it. i thought.
I pushed the door open and entered the building. I heard him muttering to someone next to him,
How rude the medical students are.
I thought of telling him that you asked for it. There was no need to act so big when you knew I was a medical student and that there was no point picking a fight with me.
“Odichal lekkillemkil moothammakkirunnottey” sensible one spoke.
‘Shut up’ I told her.
A part of me knew I was taking my anger at the security guard and he really didn’t deserve it. But he wasn’t helpful either.
Not my day. I told myself.
The wards were quiet.
Except for the nurses walking in the corridor carrying the BP apparatus, even the corridors were empty.
I checked the duty room. Few resident doctors were inside the duty room and they were talking. I couldn’t just walk in and ask one of them for a med certificate.
I went back to the medical ward.
I saw Jomon’s friend Ranjith standing at the nurses station and talking to a pretty mallu nurse. I had heard rumors about the two of them.
Idiot, I thought. She thinks he would marry her. Doesn’t she know that she will be history the moment this guy finishes his residency?
‘You are a cynic’ Spoke Sensible one
‘I am sensible. I know how a Mallu brain works. He is already counting the Lakhs he is going to get as dowry. She is wasting her time’
‘Why can’t you accept that it could be true love?’
‘True love? you can buy true love of a mallu with money!’
‘You are so prejudiced’
‘I am not.’
Ranjith turned around and saw me. He quickly grabbed the case files in front of him and started to speak loudly
“You can start the drip for that patient now, call me if the BP goes up” He started to walk and as he came near me
“Hi, Nina, what are you doing here?”
“I need a favour” I told him bluntly
“What do you want?”
“Need a med cert”
“Med Cert? For what?”
I didn’t want to complicate the issue by telling him that Princy caught me today.
“I had migraine this morning and I want a med cert”
“Migraine ah!” He nodded his head as though he understood.
I was so relieved to learn how compassionate he was.
“Hmm” He looked at me.
“Sorry Nina, I can’t give you a med cert for Migraine. I don’t have your case history and I can’t give you a med cert without proper records. You need to see the Prof. He will examine you and issue you a med cert.”
He just walked away.
I stood there Dumbfounded.
Damn him. He has been a medical student and he knows how life is. He didn’t have to act so big. Giving me a med cert was not going to kill him. Damn him. Damn him. I cursed.
Now what? Who was I going to ask? I hated rejections and I couldn’t bring myself to ask another resident for fear of being denied again.
‘Ask and it shall be given’. Sensible one reminded me.
I remembered the painting that always hung in our living room.
It was a painting on a mat that my father bought from the Chukoor( ? spelling) shop in Kottayam.it had a cross on the top and a wine of grapes by the side. I was a 11 year old girl with zero english knowledge when Appa bought it and I asked Appa, Amma and Chechy what the wordings meant. Each of them told me to look in the dictionary.
I did. I checked the English Malayalam dictionary and it made no sense
Ask= Chodikkuka, Kelkkuka
it= ( Can’t remember the translation now)
Shall= Bhavi kalam
Given = Tharum, tharanam..one of those words.
I gave up trying to understand what it meant. But I knew then that one day I will learn English and I will know what Ask and it shall be given means.

I didn’t want to ask anyone. I had to find some other way.
I checked my watch. Too late to go back to the campus. Besides I wasn’t allowed to attend any classes without presenting a med cert to Princy. That also means I will not be seeing Dr. Murthy today.
Damn.
Why did he want to see me? I wondered. My assignments were all up to date.
Should I go back to the campus and see Dr. Murthy or should I stay back and wait until 5.30 for Dr. Bhatti.
Mallu nurse came out of the nurses station holding the IV stand.
“Are you looking for Dr. Bhatti?” She asked
“Nah”
She looked at me to see then what am I here for?
“I missed the rounds this morning, so I came to review the cases”
“Oh, we have 5 new cases” She replied. “If you can give me a few minutes, I will show you all the new patients”
“Sure”
I walked to the nurses station thinking how sweet the nurse is. The sceptic in me knew she was going to end up with a broken heart. But I really wished she wouldn’t. It wasn’t fair for someone like her to suffer.
I glanced at the patient on bed 1. Another middle aged woman.
The first case file on the counter belonged to patient on Bed 1. The metal folder was still the same. Number 1 was written on top just above the clip. The only changes were the papers in the folder. Mariamma’s folder was thick with all the lab reports. I picked up the folder and put it at the bottom of all the other folders.
I knew I was being stupid and dumb. I knew life has to go on. I knew I needed to read more about the new patient before Dr. Bhatti comes for the rounds. I had to, but I couldn’t.
Later, I will read it later. I promised.
I looked at the case file of the boy with Leukemia. He was getting referred to CMC Vellore. I hoped he would recover.
Little while later the nurse came back. She threw the needles in to the bin and then went to wash her hands.
She then came back and started opening the drawers one by one and was looking for something,
Finally she found something and came to me and whispered
“I heard you talking to Dr. Ranjith. Don’t tell anyone I gave you this” She tore a page from the med cert book and gave it to me.
“Thank you” I was genuinely grateful. (and I watched where she kept the book back!)