“Are you coming?” Amma asked
“To the church” Amma sounded so exasperated. Couldn’t I figure out if she was wearing a silk saree on Sunday morning then perhaps she was going to the church?
Well, there were plenty of reasons why I didn’t want to go to church. But I knew Amma wouldn’t be interested in hearing any of my reasons.
“I don’t have to go to the church to pray Amma. Didn’t Jesus say where two or three come together in my name, then I am among them?”
Amma looked at me to see where I was going with my creative revelation.
“Liza is here and I am here, that is two already Ma, so Why go all the way to the church and look for Jesus, when I can have Jesus right here?”
I braced for Amma’s usual outburst spiced with her legendary curses.
She stared at me for what felt like an eternity.
I wondered did I for once managed to have the last word?
Amma took the umbrella and her handbag and started to walk towards the main door. She whispered slowly
“One day you will learn Nina! I hope to God that you won’t have to pay a heavier price Nina”
Yeah right. Divine retribution.
The basis of religious propagation.
What do I have that was worth losing?
I owned nothing.
When there are people like ‘daddy’ who has been writing MBBS final exam for 10 years, I knew I will eventually pass MBBS, even if it takes a decade.
Hmm. That was a tricky question.
Would I be upset if I lost Arjun?
I wanted to be able to say No, because I was sure I didn’t love him. But I couldn’t.
‘You love him Nina’ Sensible one spoke
‘No I don’t’
I couldn’t have loved him, because I still loved Beautiful Eyes and I knew one day we can clear all the confusion and be together.
May be the day after tomorrow, or the day after that
But definitely one day.
I was sure of that.
But Arjun, where do I place him?
All I ever wanted was someone to love me and I thought my life would be perfect when that happens.
So here I was, being loved by one guy and in love with another and at risk of losing both (and end up as the dreaded spinster)
‘Feet in two boats, feet in two boats’ Sang sensible one
‘Shut up’ I yelled.
“Are you ok Nina?” Liza yelled from her room
“What?” I yelled back
“who were you talking to?” Liza came out her room and was looking at me.
“Are you crazy? I wasn’t talking to anyone. You think I am mad or what?”
Liza looked at me and then spoke
“May be someone was talking downstairs”
“May be” I agreed.
” So where did Amma Maharani go?”Liza asked
“Who knows? Must be missing Mallu company”
“Yeah, She needs to let others know that her oldest daughter bought her own apartment”
“Have you seen Chehcy’s place?”
“Nah, I am not interested”
“come on Nina, you know very well.”
Of course I knew, but a part of didn’t want my sisters to hate Maria
“ee rakthathil enikku pankilla(Pontius Pilate” I am innocent of this man’s blood” Liza spoke while pretending to wash her hands.
I didn’t say anything.
Just wished that my sister would understand what she was doing.
Current song stuck in my head. Here