As I came out of the Dr’s consultation room, all eyes were on me. It didn’t bother me at all. Few minutes ago, I was hoping to run away to Chengannur. Now all I wanted was to go back home. I had a lot of things to achieve. I wanted to show my mother I can be as good as my sisters.
“Koche where did your mother go leaving you here all alone?”
I looked up and saw a woman staring at me. She was the one who was staring at me from the time I came to the orthopaedics department. I wanted to so badly tell her that my mother just left me here and vanished and I have no idea where she is or when she is going to come back.
“My aunty works in the hospital and Amma went to see her.” I don’t know why I lied. I just couldn’t crucify my mother.
“Oh ok. Which dept is your aunt working?” She asked me again
“I don’t know”.
“Is she a nurse?”
“Yes. She is a nurse” I nodded my head.
“Oh ok.”. She went back to her seat. I saw her gently massaging her son’s forehead. He had a plaster cast on his hand. He was twisting and turning his body and pushing his mother’s hand away.
The nurse called
“Jacob John” and I watched the mother helping her son to get up.
“No, I can get up on my own. Leave me alone and stop fussing over me” and he pushed her hand away.
She silently walked next to him, still holding her son’s elbow. I wondered if Jacob John would ever know, how much I wanted my mother to hold my hand.
After the consultation, as they were leaving, she turned and looked at me.
I smiled and waved them bye and said in my heart, please don’t go.Please stay till my mother returns. I am scared. I have no aunty here’. But she just walked away still holding her son’s elbow and he was still trying to push her away.
I was beginning to feel hungry and still there were no sign of my mother. It was lunch time visiting hours and I saw people rushing in and out through the wards carrying tiffin boxes and lunch packets. The smell of blanched banana leaf wrapped rice and different types of curries were making me even more hungrier. Someone got a packed lunch for the man without a leg sitting next to me.
He opend the news paper cover and then slowly opened the banana leaf and spreading it out on his lap. I could smell Sambar and cabbage thoran. He even had little bit of pickle on one side of the rice.
I have been taught not to stare when someone is eating. But I hoped if the man see me staring, may be he will offer me part of his lunch. He was here when Amma left me and gone 4 hours ago and he would know that I would be hungry. I watched him mixing the rice and sambar and eating it slowly. He was eating one urula after another. Every mouth of rice that went in his mouth, I felt that is one less mouth of rice for me in the leaf, incase he planned to share it with me. I prayed silently
‘Jesus, please ask him to share his rice with me, for I am your child and I am hungry.’
When he finished half of the rice in his leaf, he stopped eating. I was so glad. I was sure Jesus heard my prayer. He doesn’t want little children to suffer. He is our lord and praise be to him!.
Then I saw him folding the leaf over the leftover rice. I thought may be it is easier for him to pass the rice to me if he folded the leaf , otherwise the rice might drop through the gap in the leaf and I won’t be able to eat it. He then folded the news paper over the banana leaf and then crushed and squashed and made a small bundle out of it. In one single swing the bundle and my hope went in to the rubbish bin that was kept near the corner.
I admire how time after time u lied for ur mom. U have lot of patience
I love ela choru, with chutta samandhi, etheykka mezhukkuperrati and that red kid of rice.
OMG! I can feel the dissapointment you had when the rice pack landed in the rubbish bin!
It’s a pity he didn’t sense that you were hungry 🙁
You are great.. you lied for your mother. Even adults don’t think of it sometimes.
🙁
:((( sometime i dont understand how heartless some parents can be –
Got me lip smacking on a friday morning..
was it your dream ?
feeling were described very finely .
-ATG
Sarah,
🙁 Where did she go? And ela choru…mmmm the delcious aroma must ve made u go :((( You should definitely combine these posts into a book… Its interesting…yeah but the key is that its so very inspiring….
Adrika
That was not nice at all of your mom to leave you for such a long time – she must have known you’d be hungry! I suffered with you when I read the story – you narrated it so vividly that I could almost smell the curry .. and hear your stomach complain!
Your style of writing is fabulous … I love it!!
Ela choru is fantastic and Yummie.. mmm
But I have hunch that you are being too critical on your mom on the past few posts :(..
PS: You are picture Tagged
ohhh Meal on Leaf! wow you dont need any dishes for it…only salt and the flav of ela will be enough for you to gulp all..hehhe…
She left you alone for four hours? What was wrong with her!!! There is absolutely no excuse for what she did!!! She seems heartless.
Ah…
That is one heart wrenching post.
The innocence of 11 year old really stands out, beautifully written.
It is a shame really, some people throw away food when there are lots around who dont have any..
Oopsy…that hurts. Both ur mom & the food thrown.
It is v.sad to note that u’d to go thru so much while u were so young.
Sad but beautiful post.
I am going to Kerala on vacation. Will miss ur lovely posts for sometime. God bless you, Sarah
When I pass through Kottayam I will remember 11 yr old Nina
Sarah. You are the sweetest person. covered for your mother time after time never wanting to let her down and make people think ill of her.
How hurtful..:(
I feel like giving you a hug, Sarah. *hug
you are great!.. to tell lies to save your mom from being scolded by others. But how come she left you for hours without even bothering.. something really strange.. but appreciate you for being strong enough!
Thanu: Me too.. the last time I was in Kottayam, I had the ela choru from best hotel.. it was soooo good
Geetha: Now when I eat, if I see someone eyeing my food.. I always ask, would you like to have some.. because I have been there..
jac:!
Visithra: it isn’t being heartless.. sometimes parents have weird ideas and judgements..
Mathew: and what did you eat?
ATG:..nope.. it was real..
Adrika: To this day, I have no idea where she went.. But the smell of food.. that made me even more hungrier
I love Munich: tht was sweet of you to say tht you could smell the curries.. Now I am hungry..thinking about the food
dhanush: Ela choru is what made long distance train journeys a wonderful experience.. I am not trying to be critical of mother.. and will do the Tag
Q8techdrive: Did you try besthotel ela choru??
Silverine: She did and I don’t know why..
Raji: There is always two side of the coin.. It wasn’t that, we didn’t have money to buy food.. yet I was hungry, yet I looked at a stranger hoping tht he would share his food with me.. Life is weird!
Has to be me: there is an advantage.. Nothing can break my spirit anymore..
Techno: have a super holidays..may you find peace, happiness, plenty of upperi and chance to see the vallom kali
Starry: you would do the same, if you were in my place!
Cynthia: thank you for the hugs
Sujit: I assume, she had old friends or classmates at the hospital and used the opportunity to visit them instead of sitting and waiting with me to see the Dr. I don’t know..
I think even if I was full, if I see someone eating from my ila, I would deifintely feel hungry again!
What’s wrong with your mother Sarah?
Gosh Sarah…I suffered while reading…so can imagine how it is to go thru in real…!
Your patience …gosh!!! I admire you more ..:)
Cheers
i am hungry right now too …just got back from my trip 🙂