On sunday evening, we started packing Chechy’s bags. Amma placed the big brown suitcase in the middle of the dining room. To me the bag looked like the mouth of a big serpent, opened wide and swallowing everything that is part of my family, that also makes my sister.
First went all her clothes. Then her toileteries. Amma bought new tooth brush and Cibaca toothpaste for her. 5 bars of Pears soap and a big bottle of Tiara egg shampoo. Amma sealed the shampoo cap with masking tape, so it won’t leak out.
Then I saw chechy taking my hair brush
“Hey that is my hair brush”. I told her
“Ofcourse, but I don’t have another good hair brush, besides your hair is short and you can use Amma’s comb”.
I wanted to tell her ‘I don’t want to use Amma’s comb, she applies instant hair dye and her comb is black, dirty and yucky’.
Chechy was folding towels. I saw her folding my favourite pink towel, that I bought with my angpao from the night market. That towel is very fluffy with big red flower print. That was the only pink towel with red flower the shop had. All the others were yellow and blues flowers. I aslo have matching bedsheet and pillow case for that towel and I saw Chechy folding that as well.
I sat down on the floor next to the suitcase and looked at all the things my sister is taking to the university. She is not only taking everything that belonged to her,, but also things that are mine, my address book, that Siti my best friend gave me as a gift when we left Malaysia. It was an old diary with brown cover and gold edge. Siti wrote her address in the front page, so I can always send her a letter. Then I saw Chechy packing my green bangles that Ammachi bought for me. It is my first set of bangles. Chechy rolled news paper and packed the glass bangles one by one, all 12 bangles that I treassured. Then I saw her taking my brown parker pen with a golden cap. Appa gave me that pen, for scoring straight A’s for my UPSR exam.
“No Maria, you are not taking my pen, Appa gave me that.”
I tried to snatch it from her hand
“How can you be so selfish Nina, your sister is going to the university and you still want to fight with her for a silly stupid pen?”
“This is not s silly stupid pen, Appa gave me this”
“So?, Does the pen have two tails? you can always get another pen that looks like this!”
“Chechy has her own pen, why does she need my pen?”
“Maria, give the pen back to her, Oh mother of God, why did I give birth to such a selfish daughter, no wonder she is deaf and blind”
“Here take your stupid pen”,Maria threw my pen down and I picked it up from the floor and ran out side.
My heart was aching and I went to my hiding spot inside the banana thicket. There was too much green moss on the floor and I had to sit down. My legs were shaking. I couldn’t breath. I wanted to cry, but my tears didn’t come. I looked at the pen, then I remembered Maria throwing it down.
My god,’The nib’, I quickly opened the cap to check if the nib was broken. When I opened the golden cap, blue ink splashed out. There was nothing to wipe the ink off. I couldn’t use my dress to wipe the ink, it will stain. I used my palm and slowly wiped the ink off the nib. The tip of the nib was split and I knew I would never be able to write with that pen again. I shook the pen in anger and the ink started falling off like tears.
Daughters of Tomorrow
pears….do you remember Moti soap? that round big big one?
is MOTI still in market? perhaps its a nice idea to make a list of that old old stuffs that we used before and are phased out of the market due to the influx of new brands…
Visit me!
ya.. being child is to like things that are given as gifts with much more love… and saying htat its mine!!.. did the pen work?.. since the cap was closed nothig should have happened right?
as a kid i alwaz used to hate how older siblings got away with everything…
Oh man!the nib split…too bad.Your chechi was rather selfish.
i remember lots of those brands we used at home when i was a kid… they are such an essential part of our memories…often wonder if i ll remember the brands i use now when i grow older.
CyberRowdy the moti soap is very much in the market, though struggling I must say.
Every needs a shoulder to cry on, even the strong. But that rarely happens, isn’t it?
I remember the fountain ink pens. Sometimes the things that mean so much but others think it is tiveal.
I don’t think it was the pen per se, I guess it was what it meant to you??
I don’t know about the older ones getting away with everything though. it just depends.
Wonderful description, Sarah!!!
I still remember that my brother and sister (younger to me only) never dare to touch my hero pen without my permission. it was also my father’s present. Whatever silly it was, it is priceless. I am still keeping it though I am not writing anything.
You describe every scene so vividly .. fantastic! I find it very inconsiderate of mour mom to simply give your sister what was yours – didn’t she understand she would hurt your feelings? College or not .. that was not fair! And your sister did behave rude as well .. it must have been very hard on you!
The last part made me sad Sarah…am very close to my dad and whatever he has given..whether its advise in the form of proverb I have saved them …I can understand your pain…!
At one point I felt that yeah…many times we share things with others even though they are close and we keep mum…but then some are there which hurts inside…
I loved this post very matured one
Cheers
Touched !
sarah,
do you have a diary from that time ?…there is so much detail in these posts…and the turns are really smooth,neat great job
ohh!! emotional 🙁
i am moved
hey sara thnks for visiting my blog
I am going through your blog it’s interesting
‘jeevitha satyangale savisheshamaya bhashayiloode chithreekarikkumpolanu oralude ezhuthine vaayanakkar nenjilettunnathu.Anubhavam undayittu maathram kaaryamilla ennartham.Ethe vare ningal ezhuthiyathil onnum angane oru prathekathayum njan kandilla. Sambhavangale niram pidippichu avatharippikkuka matharamayirunnu ‘dr’ ethevare cheythu kondirunnathu.Akkaryam njan soochippichittum undu.Languaginu flow varanundenkilum, ningal ezhuthi thelinju kondirikkunnu. Estapetta penayude ‘nib’odinju poya kuttiyude sankadam ningalude ee ezhuthiloode enikku anubhavedya mayi ennu prathekam parayendiyirikkunnu.Good show.
Zerohour
Q8techdrive: I bought Motti soap abt 7 yrs ago when I attended a conference in Mumbai. I was so excited to see the soap!
Sujit: No the pen didn’t work.. though the cap was closed the impact was too much and the nib split, which meant when I write with it..it will be doublw
Thanu: The older one was always given because of seniority.
Maya: Thanks
Neihal: I always wanted a bottle of Tiara egg shampoo.. Mother never bought claiming tht I hv short hair and there for not in need of shampoo.
Siverine: Amma’s fav dialogue was”god will send someone when you need” and in my case it was always Me,,
Starrynights: I still have collection of things are junk to others and treassure to me
Suemamma: the pen meant so much to me, firstly because Appa was never someone who gave gifts.. secondly it was the only sign that I was a straight A student once especially because I was getting ‘0’ when we came back to India!
YSAJ: Annan ipploum gama ulla chettan ano?
I love munich: I don’t know why, I was always expected to give.. always. It didn’t matter that I am also a human and have needs.
Dawn: thanks
Rocksea: thanks
Dew drops: thanks
Haffez: thank you for visiting.. you have a super blog too
Anon: thanks
Eventhough somethings meant nothing to some people, it may mean so much for others. She was rather selfish I should say, not you. You were very generous to let go of everything she packed.