Gosh

I moved my residence twice, refused to give the forwarding address to the realtor. Changed my house telephone number and pays for having it unlisted. I am not part of any mallu organization. I do not speak to Mallu friends who knew me here for fear of my older sister contacting them to find me. I walked away from every support network I had here including my relatives.

I have gone to all these extent because I really do not want anything to do with my sisters.

There came a point where I had to make a choice. I just couldn’t go through the theatrics any more.

I have my share of struggles, but that is ok for I am capable of handling it. I like my life the way it is. I get to choose who I want to talk to and what I want to do with my life. I also get to choose how I raise my kids. I get to decide what I consider as my success or my failures. I am the captain of my ship and I sail wherever I want to go.

I was so angry when my sister attempted to contact Yaya. First of all she was undermining my authority. I guess she was trying to show me that she doesn’t give a fig for my feelings, after all she was speaking to her niece!. Now that Yaya is 18, I will not tell her not to talk to my sisters, I have to let her make those choices even though I will not be happy.. I hope she wouldn’t talk to her aunt because my child has no idea how vindictive and vengeful my older sister can be. Or how my sister will play her manipulative games and turn my child against me.

I have been so happy and peaceful. I love the house where I live, we have so much of laughter and fun.. I have a beautiful garden… and yet I am beginning to feel the need to take my kids and run.. some where far away from my family.. My family is a like jelly fish..and I keep cutting the tentacles and it keeps growing. It is a nightmare that I can’t just seem to escape.

 

6 thoughts on “Gosh

  1. Don’t run! Turn around and talk to your kids. Together you all are stronger. Best to let them tell your family that they do not want to talk or even better, don’t say anything and ignore.

    • MS: I had promised myself that when my kids turn 18, I will not tell them what to do with their life. Like you said, I decided to ignore and say nothing.

  2. You raised your kids well Sarah. Dont worry. They can judge well . They will stand with u. If the No comes from the kids to ur sisters ,they will back off. That will be best. Dont run away.

    • smitha: my kids have no idea how horrible my sisters can be. They still think they have an awesome grandma, who sent them all those cure gifts for Christms when they were little (I sent them, because my family is incapable of such acts of kindness)

  3. Sarahchechi,

    I had send you couple of emails. No reply. Hope all well, other than the usual dramas which you should be used to by now. Hugs to u and the kids.

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