All these years whenever I told a Christian that I didn’t believe in Christianity, he or she would go berserk. I would be threatend that I need to repent right away or I will suffer the wrath of hell, or I would be called a traitor.
Everyone has hundreds of reasons why I should believe in Christianity and they list out all the merits of Christianity.
No one ever asked me if I don’t believe in Christianity, then what do I believe in?
No one until now.
Dr Bhatti was looking at me and I asked him
“Do we need to believe in something sir?”
Dr. Bhatti didn’t answer right away. he was busy eating dosai. He finished eating the dosai and then he used the spoon and ate the remaining sambar in the bowl. Then he got up to wash his hands.
I ate my dosai quickly and hoped Babu will come and collect the plates before Dr. Bhatti returns. There was no way I was going to drink the sambar and I didn’t want Dr. Bhatti to notice that I wasted food.

I watched Dr. Bhatti walking back to out table while wiping his hand on the hand kerchief.
He was going to see the sambar in the bowl.
I didn’t want to face him. So I got up to go and wash my hand.
I didn’t have any handkerchief. I looked around to see if anyone was watching me. There wasn’t. So I wiped my hand on my salwar and then walked back to our table.

“We all believe in something” Finally Dr. Bhatti spoke.
“Not necessarily sir. Atheist don’t believe in God”
I wondered when Dr. Bhatti would realize that I have an MA degree? Masters in Argument!
“Are you sure?”
“Of course Sir. Athiest don’t believe in God. They believe they are responsible for their own actions”
Dr.Bhatti looked at me and grinned.
It took me a few seconds to realize how deep the hole I dug and got myself in to.
I couldn’t help but to smile.
Babu came to clear the plates and I knew we made a pretty good impression! ( smiling at each other)

“Come, let us go for the rounds”
Dr. Bhatti called Babu and asked for the bill and paid.

We walked to the wards silently. I don’t know what Dr. Bhatti was thinking. I assumed he must have thought I was an idiot. But it didn’t matter to me.
For me what mattered was that I finally found someone who knew how to argue with me and win.
It felt so good to lose an argument!
“Oh, I forgot. I have been wanting to tell you this. Do you know the four stages of grief?” Dr. Bhatti asked
“No, sir”
“Dr. Elizabeth Ross had written about the 4 stages of grief. You should read it. You can read about it in the Psychiatry books”
“Sure sir”
But we had a problem. I had internals in few weeks and then the externals. I haven’t yet started to study and I was beginning to get a bit worked up. Imagine studying studying subjects taught over a year in a week. Not one subject, but three!
“Sir, is it ok if I don’t come for the evening rounds till after the exams?”
Dr. Bhatti stopped walking and was looking at me.
Oh No, he must be angry with me. I shouldn’t have asked him such a dumb question. Now I ruined my chances to excel in Medicine. He was doing me a favour and I had the temerity to ask for leave.
“Last minute studying?” Dr. Bhatti asked.
Truth or lie? What would he think of me if I tell him that I am a strong believer of last minute madness ie Procrastination?
Should I tell the truth?
Should I lie and tell him that I have studied everything and now I am doing revision number 3?

To hell with it.
“Yes sir” I told the truth.
He laughed.
“You remind me of someone I know” He replied
“Who sir” I had to ask.
“Me”

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