The other day, I was at the basketball court canteen and I watched two sisters bickering. Eventually the verbal fight became a physical fight and the older one pulled the younger one’s hair ( pretty hard) and the younger one ran to the mother screaming ” I am going to tell on you”. I heard the older one saying “Go ahead, I don’t give a damn” ( of course she doesn’t give a damn, she had already inflicted enough pain by yanking her sister’s hair and the mother isn’t going to come and yank her hair to make it even!)

If I close my eyes and think about chechy, the first thing I remember is her nails, Nah make that talons. She used to use her nails like claws whenever we had a fight and even if I went to my mother complaining, there was no point. How does Amma screaming at my sister take away the pain from the scratches my sister inflicted on me?

Older siblings have a physical advantage over younger siblings.
From the time my children were little, I have had this rule “No physical fights” You are angry, you talk and deal with it. And if they did have a physical fight and came to me screaming blue murder, I didn’t take sides. They broke my rule of no physical fights, so the victim and the perpetrator had time out.

But there is another side of bullying that I have noticed lately.

Both my older children pick on baby. It started of with her love of chocolates. Baby love chocolates. I have read about chocoholics, but even then I had never imagined there are people who can eat chocolate like this. My child can eat a whole box of chocolate in one sitting. She will then ask for more. When we travel, she packs her bag with chocolates and books. She eats chocolate non stop.
Yaya started calling baby “fat”
Baby isn’t fat, But according to Yaya, eating so much chocolate is unhealthy and baby is on her way to be fat.
Then it was her clothes. If Baby is given a chance, she will happily wear her pj and go to school. She forgets to brush her teeth, comb her hair, wear proper clothes..the list is endless.. and it is all true,
And her siblings pick on her mercilessly.
I have tried to explain to them that we live in a free world and that they can’t judge their sister using their yardstick..
It isn’t that Yaya and toothless are mean. But, they just don’t see how much their comments and criticisms affects baby.
I defend my youngest child’s right to eat chocolate, right to wear clothes that she likes.. but I feel sorry for her. She has such big shoes to fill in to.