I didn’t have any sex education at school.
I remember wanting to read the 10 std biology book when I was in 8th std ( there were supposed to be diagrams of male and female body in the biology book.). But the logistics involved in getting a 10th std book when you are in 8th std was a bit difficult.By the time I was in 10th std, I was too busy studying to actually spend time to understand ‘things’ we are supposed to understand without actually being taught. !! ( obviously learned the fine art of rort learning, because I had no idea what I was learning)
I was also a loner at school mostly because Amma encouraged us not to talk about Appa to our friends and I used my loner identity as a shield to protect me from others. So I missed out on the usual sex talks the pre adolescent kids have.
Happily I went to the medical college believing Akkachi’s story about the belly button and the zipper!! ( I still can’t believe I was that naive)
I felt that my children should be taught what they need to know at home. It is my job as their mother to teach them about sex. I had this wonderful notion that I will answer all their questions truthfully..and I did.
It went like this
When my son was about 7, he asked me how babies are born.
My truthful answer …”Mothers go to hospital to give birth”
I actually wanted to hit my head on the wall..
But what was I supposed to say to a 7 year old boy? That the mother gets labour contractions and the cervix dilates etc etc??
Along the same time, the school send a note saying that they are bringing in a sex education counsellor and requires my permission for my children to attend the sex education class. I was also invited to a preview of what the counsellor will be teaching my kids the day before the actual session. ( truth be told, I was happy to let someone else to do the talking)
Happily I went for the preview.
She( counsellor) talked about the physical changes etc, talked about sex and what happens during sex, she then proceeded to talk about contraception and how to use the condom..She even demonstrated the correct application of condom using a banana..then she casually said it is better that pre school and kindergarten students learn the correct application of condom, so we can prevent STD’s.
What? She was going to show my 5 year old baby how to use the condom??
Now, I am doctor and I am not a prude, But I want my children to learn about sex at the right time. I wasn’t going to let my kindergarten child learn about how to use a condom. I couldn’t.
I refused to sign the permission slip.
I have sat with each of my children and talked to them about their body, what changes can be expected.. etc.
I also explained about sex to Yaya and Josh. Baby is too young..
The reason for this post is
My son loves James Patterson books.
He read Kill me if you can two days ago and told me it is a good book and insisted that I read, so I read.
There is incest ( father and daughter and extremely descriptive) in the book.
I am extremely uncomfortable after I read the book.
Both Yaya and toothless read at University level. It is not possible for me to tell them not to read a book because they are too young. But I worry, if a 11 years old is matured enough to read about incest..