The monster in me

There is a monster in me. I know it is there and I am so helpless when it comes out..

I suffer from severe PMS and no one seems to understand it.
I have been told that I am using my PMS as an excuse.

I wish I could explain..

I am normally a very rational, calm person and all of a suddent I turn in to someone even I despise myself.
I get upset for every little thing.
I don’t think before I do anything
I shut myself out
I scream
I write letters full of vitriol
I drive so rashly that sometimes I am even scared to take the car out, cause there were times I have driven like a maniac.

But the worst is the anger.. it is like I am sitting on a pot over simmering fire..and any little thing is enough for me to burst..

My children have been living with me..and have learned to cope by ignoring me..
I know it isn’t fair to ask everyone in my life to understand that I go through this phase every month..
The hardest part is even when I know I suffer from PMS, there is nothing..absolutely nothing I can do to help me..

4 thoughts on “The monster in me

  1. You can talk to a doctor. There are medications meant specifically for this condition, and those can help you. Your rage in driving can hurt someone innocent, someone who donot know, you are in PMS mode. It is not fair to make your kids “cope” every month with this stuff.

  2. I am sure, you have heard this before, regular exercise about 30 mins a day and meditation for about 30 mins will be able to help you. Again, there is no easy solution, the key is to enjoy the exercise, and calm your mind during meditation.
    You may not notice on the short term basis, but again it is about working out diligently.

    All the best.

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