Run Nina Run

I guess, i never realized till now how profound is my need to run.
Whenever anything upsets me, my first reaction is to close myself like a clam. Then nothing can hurt me, I am safe inside my shell.
I have done this always.
It is the only way I know to survive

But I also do an excellent job in running..

4 Continents so far!

Right now, I would love to pack the bags, grab the kids and run, to somewhere unknown, away from everyone.
New life, new adventure, new challenges..
I am so tempted to do just that.

But for the first time in my life, I sit here with my laptop at 3 in the morning and am actually thinking the pros and the cons of running.

It is almost a year since i came to down under.
The bottle brush tree outside my bedroom is blooming already.. In a couple of weeks rainbow Lorikeets will come to drink the nectar. When i first came here, I used to sit in my bedroom and watch the birds. Just as I looked forward to the blooming cherry blossoms on the way to my kids school in Canada, I looked forward to the return of the Lorikeets. But that is all there that is holding me to this place..there is this need to run.. again..

I wonder where my Shangri la is
I wonder if I will ever find my Shangri la
I wonder if I there be a day I can stop running..

10 thoughts on “Run Nina Run

  1. phoenix: honestly, Alaska has always been the first place i thought of running away to.. The only reason I couldn't do so was the fact that I will have to eat moose and caribou..I am too set in my ways!!!

  2. I've always felt like running away too–running away from responsibilities, (those we haven't chosen, but are thrust upon us), from unpleasant things, from day to day dreary reality sometimes. But I have to admit–to my surprise–that the need is much less now.

  3. I am a person who moves constantly, even if I donot want to. I hate moving and like to stay put, but just opposite of that happens. I changed my school every year, till my 12th grade. Oen bad aspect of moving is: you loose friends and familiarity with things and life. Some times change is good, sometimes it is bad, dependign on where you go. I envy people who are born and stay in the same home and street, till they become adults. Donto know, how they get by the life's changes?

  4. Ohh…the itch to run away…the comfort the idea gives…to a place where there is no criticism, no bickering, no in between the lines conversations, no comparisons, no pretensions….where for once you are liked and accepted for who you are and where we can be ourselves without the fear to have to pretend that you are better then u originally are…where we can walk with our heads held high up..

  5. susan: i do hope i will out grow this need to run eventually.. this is becoming a big hassle..

    Gardenlane: I hate to stay put.. I hate the same old kinda feeling..

    Sumi: You said everything that i feel..and that too you said it very well..to live life without pretensions..now tht is a dream

  6. What is it that makes us run,
    Even if not literally?
    Why is there
    The burning, the yearning and
    Churning in the soul …?

    To start it all over again
    May be a second chance …!

    Can it be
    My sense of awareness
    Of my imperfections –
    Society’s value systems,
    Traditions, guilt,
    Need for acceptance or
    My hope for the better?

    OR can it be by chance
    The unrest of the soul?

  7. Just remember Sarah, there is always hope. Have faith till the last breath. Never give in to depression or the urge to run. How far can you run? And finally, when you will have no physical or mental strength to run, then, how will you run away from all those feelings in your mind and heart?

    Take heart. We all are here for some purpose even if we have to toil and suffer.

    All the Best,
    Shail

  8. Muthoor: running to find a safe haven.. when each time the haven is breached, I run..

    shail: i am tired of running..but sometimes there is no choice..but to run till the very last breath..because unlike most, i have a family that is toxic to the core..

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