I consider myself to be a fairly smart mother. I have enough life experiences to kind of figure out what my children are up to most of the time. But then again my children have learned the fine art of cornering me without me even realizing it.
I was taking my kids for swimming this evening and was stuck in the after school traffic jam. My daughter ( Yaya) very nicely asked me if dancing is considered a sport?
I didn’t waste too much time thinking about it. I was busy concentrating on the road. Besides I had this visual image of ice skaters competing and I told her yes, dancing is a sport.
At the pool it was time to decide if Yaya wanted to train for Quad as she has completed the swim levels. She informed me that she wasn’t going to continue with swimming.
We have 2 family rules that are enforced very strictly
1. They will join one sport ( minimum) and my kids chose Swimming.
2 If anyone wanted to do quit a sport they joined, they can only do so after a year.
I reminded her about the one sport rule and the one year rule.
She looked straight in to my eyes and said
“Mama, I finished all the swim levels and I want to join a dance class now”
And I asked her
“Since when did dance became a sport?”
She gave me that smile.
And I knew I lost!
( And I hate to lose)
What is worth fighting and what is not..
It is a constant struggle.
Once my youngest decided that she was going to be cookie box and wore the Thinsation carton ( from costco) as a T shirt. I had to visit a friend and I contemplated if I should tell my daughter to take the box off. I was also a bit worried what my friend might think when she sees my daughter as it was the first time we were meeting.
But then I figured since there is no harm to my child, I will let her wear the cookie box and if my friend thought that we are a weird family, so be it. My daughter was a cookie box till the box ripped. We didn’t have another box that she could wear, she was fine with that. She had a good time.
Now it is my son and his decision to grow his hair.
He hasn’t had a hair cut since November.
I checked his school handbook. There is nothing mentioned about hair lengths.
My son’s argument is that his long hair is not detrimental to his health. The only concern would be head lice and if he does have head lice, then it would be similar to girls with head lice and same rules apply. He also talks about treatment for head lice.
He talks about famous men with long hair. He knows about Sikhs not cutting their hair.
I know one of these days, i will get that call from the school office and I will have to meet with the principal.
A part of me knows my son can and should be allowed to make that decision of growing his hair. But then there are rules. Actual rules and perceived rules. Boys with
I am looking for ICAS past papers for grade 7, 5 and 3.
My mother not only had 4 daughters, but also an entity called everybody. We always had to do what everybody did, irrelevant if we wanted or not.
Perhaps it was her obsession with everybody that made me such a rebel, to an extent that I don’t care what everybody thinks/does/wants etc.
Yesterday was our garbage collection day. I am extremely particular about recycling and coupled with the fact that the city only collects recycling bin every alternate weeks means that my recycling bin is always full.
But my mother found perfect solution. She dumped all the Newspaper in to the normal bin saying that everybody does it. I tried telling her that I don’t care what everybody does, but things like Newspaper that can be perfectly recycled will go in to the recycle bin. If the bin is full, we will keep the newspaper for the next round.
She then had the audacity to tell me that I am weird! and I have lost my marbles. She doesn’t see why I should bother about such trivial things when everybody doesn’t bother.
I don’t know when she will understand that I am not like everybody. I am me.
My son went to school without saying bye to me.
He woke up angry. He was mad at me for every little thing from the time he woke up. I did try to make him calm down. But nothing worked. The more I tried, the angrier he became. Then I thought I would leave him alone, that made him even more angrier because he felt I was ignoring him.
It is quiet possible that I will have to meet with the principal some time this afternoon. ( Every time he has this anger moods, he usually does something that gets him in to trouble.)
i wish I know what makes my child so angry.
I wish I know how to help my child.
I was reading an article about gifted children this morning and found that kids like him have
Exceptional reasoning ability
Rapid learning rate
Facility for abstraction
Complex thought processes
Early moral concern
Passion for learning
Powers of concentration
Keen sense of justice
Capacity for reflection
Need to understand
Need for mental stimulation
Need for precision/logic
Excellent sense of humour
Tendency to introversion
(Silverman, 1993, p. 53)
• non-participation in class activities
• sloppiness and disorganisation
• a tendency to question authority
• emotional frustration
• low interest in detail.
He has all of the negative traits, every single one of them.
How do I raise him?
I don’t know.
My son did the WISC-IV few weeks ago.
I got the report yesterday.
I guess I was afraid what the report might be and delayed getting the report till yesterday. I do that often. ( Closing me eyes and think that problem will go away).
After going through the challenges of raising Yaya, perhaps a part of me hoped that my son would be “Normal”.
Then I feel guilty for thinking like that when most parents want a smart child.
His IQ is 139.
I am happy for him. At the same time I am terrified, because my child is a loner. He keeps his friends at bay. He doesn’t compete with anyone else. (He competes with himself). He hates it when he is wrong. He gets in to trouble at school often because he questions authority. He goes through guilt conscience, sometimes over things that happened 5 – 6 years ago.
I am terrified because most children like him can go off tangent in a split second.
Every day is a struggle between persistence-perseverance and perfection. Add obsession to it and you have a nightmare in your hands.
I didn’t tell him about the results.
First of all I don’t believe in IQ tests. The school wanted the tests done so they could prepare an IEP. ( Individual Education Plan). He really needed an IEP ( he didn’t want to go to school because he was bored and he was being very rude to his teacher)was so I agreed for the tests.
I didn’t tell him about the result because knowing his IQ level is not going to improve his life right now.
Motherhood is not easy.
When I became a mother, I felt I was at the top of the world. I wanted someone to love and cherish, that someone I can call ‘mine’.
At the same time I also knew that I didn’t want myself to be anything like my own mother.
I was going to be different.
I was going to raise my children differently from how I was raised.
I was going to be there for my children.
And I knew I will protect my children, come what may.
But life doesn’t come with an erase button. Neither there is an undo button.
I am still my mother’s daughter.
Today I lied to my son. And I have always told my children that I will not tolerate them lying to me. I have always told them that, it is not that they lied that would anger me, it is that from now on I wouldn’t be able to trust them.
Yet I had no qualms lying to my son blatantly.
Amma used to snoop around my stuff when I was growing up, even coming to my medical college hostel when I was at the hospital and going through all my mails. She even perfected the fool proof way to open a letter without me knowing. She snipped the side with a sharp scissors, took the letter out, read it and then put it back and seal the edge with glue. When I get the mail, I never notice the difference.The only way I found out was once she used a cheap glue and the edges didn’t stick, so when I was putting the letter back, it came out through the other end.
I have been wanting to know who is my son’s latest crush. He wouldn’t tell me and I decided to check his email.
Why I did that, I don’t know.
I shouldn’t have.
But I did.
Unfortunately my son checked the log and noticed that someone accessed his email when he wasn’t home and asked me if I opened his email.
I should have said Yes
But I didn’t
I am horrible
I am trying to organize our Christmas vacation.
I don’t want to stay in Brisbane during December. (it is too hot for me and I haven’t yet got myself adjusted to cooking Christmas dinner on a BBQ!)
So here is the deal
4 bedroom house, fully furnished in Brisbane. .
I would like to do house swap for the month of December.
What have you got?
Do mail me.
All that I did was to answer Yaya’s question as to what specifics in a guy that I consider ‘hot’
and I replied that
He needs to be tall and have sharp features, like Mr.Z, your PE teacher!
My little one must have overheard me.
She went and told Mr. Z that my mom thinks you are hot.
How am I ever going to face Mr.Z?